Our annual anniversary blogging break ends today It’s also the actual day of our 53rd wedding anniversary.
Once you’ve been married for 50+ years, strangers you meet express both surprise coupled with admiration that anyone could be married that long. Especially to one person. Friends, family, and brethren who know your values, understand and share their appreciation and congratulations.
However, when seriously discussing a 50-year marriage, there’s one frequently asked question: “What’s your secret?”
Three years ago, while celebrating our 50th, Norma Jean and I came up with some answers that continue to work for us. We hope you find them helpful.
In his book, His Needs Her Needs, Dr.Willard Harley tells about a woman, Jane, who found her prince charming, Richard.
At 6’3″ and 195 pounds, Jane described Richard as “ruggedly handsome.” She was intrigued by his “strong, silent-type” demeanor. While dating, Jane’s “passion level went right off the scale.”
However, a few months into their marriage the passion began to wane. Richard didn’t know how to express affection outside the bedroom. His mother died when he was 10 and was raised by his father and two older brothers. Continue reading
“Why is sex before marriage a sin?” asked Linda, one of our regular readers in response to a recent post.
Linda added, “I can see how extramarital affairs, sex outside marriage can be (sinful).” She further suggested the only dangers to sex before marriage might be “unwanted sexual diseases or an unexpected or unplanned pregnancy.” However, she opined that “thankfully these days many people have access to safe birth control and condoms so they do not have to suffer heart-wrenching punishing consequences.” Continue reading
“HOLY SEX” were the first two words that Dr. Tom Hamilton, a Florida College professor, uttered yesterday in his lecture “Not in Passion of Lust.”
In the lecture book Tom wrote, “If Christians were honest with themselves, “holy sex” sounds like the greatest of all oxymorons. In any number of church buildings, the word ‘sex’ is yet to be mentioned (unless it is spelled ‘sects’), being considered a taboo topic for public proclamation.” Continue reading
Yesterday, I shared with my marriage class the 10 emotional needs from Dr. Willard Harley’s book HIS NEEDS HER NEEDS. He says five are typically male needs and the other five are female needs. He writes that meeting these needs will “affair proof your marriage.” He also affirms that when you discover your own needs and identify your mate’s needs that it will “deepen your love and desire for each other.”
So, last night I come home and find a face book notification from an old friend and former college room-mate, David Lewis. The post was from Jani Ortlund’s blog entitled “The Six Second Kiss.” Here’s what she wrote. Continue reading
One evening a man and his wife called another couple to see what they were doing. “Oh,” said the other wife, “we’re just drinking coffee and talking.” As she hung up the phone, she demanded, “Why don’t we ever do that?
They’re just drinking coffee and talking.” Her husband said, “So make a pot of coffee.” Continue reading
“Getting married is so much more weighted today, I get the impulse to want to test it,” says Hannah Seligson, the 31-year-old married author of A Little Bit Married, about 20-somethings and long-term unmarried relationships.
Now there’s a new solution. Beta Marriage! Continue reading
Have you seen the TOP TEN REASONS GOD CREATED EVE? It’s credited to anonymous. But I think Eve wrote it!
10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because men hate to ask for directions.
9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV remote. (Men don’t want to see what’s ON television, they want to see WHAT ELSE is on!)
8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when his seat wore out and would therefore need Eve to get one for him. Continue reading
“What’s your secret?” we are asked when people find out we’re celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary.
Since we are asked that question often, Norma Jean and I have come up with some answers we think have made our marriage work. “Secrets” that are not really secrets, but are not always practiced or even accepted by many people today.
In my last new post for the month of August, here are 5 specific things we think make a marriage work. At least they have contributed to the longevity of our relationship. Continue reading
New York socialites Quentin Esme Brown and Peter Cary Peterson got married last weekend in Las Vegas. But it’s not a typical, traditional marriage.
“He has always been my soulmate in every sense of the word and we felt mutually that Vegas was the place to finalize our commitment to partnership,” Brown posted on Instagram. “Peter and I are not romantically involved — in fact we are still dating others and will continue to seek love in all forms.” Continue reading