“What you do speaks so loudly, I can’t hear what you’re saying,” was once noted by Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Emerson’s observation reminds us that influence is often communicated more by what we do than by what we say.
The dictionary defines influence as “the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone or something, or the effect itself.” Influence is the sway we have over others.
Leadership guru John Maxwell famously says that leadership is influence. If that’s true, then every one of us is leading someone, whether intentionally or unintentionally. As the old adage reminds us, “He who thinketh he leadeth and hath no one following is only taking a walk.”
This principle of a life that leads is expressed—and highlighted—in Paul’s compliment to the Thessalonians on their reception of the gospel.
For our gospel did not come to you in word only, but also in power, and in the Holy Spirit and in much assurance, as you know what kind of men we were among you for your sake. (1 Thess. 1:5)
While the power to convict, convince, and convert sinners is in the gospel, preachers can blunt its impact by failing to practice what they preach. The message may be weakened by the mess the messenger has made of his life. Paul’s life was known. They could see it. And his practice complemented his preaching.
Charles Spurgeon expressed the importance of influence when he wrote, “A man’s life is always more forcible than his speech. When men take stock of him, they reckon his deeds as dollars and his words as pennies. If his life and doctrine disagree, the mass of onlookers accepts his practice and rejects his preaching.”
A preacher’s influence is felt in the pulpit not just by what he says, but by how he says it. If we disrespect God’s Word by being unprepared, people soon take note. If we speak the Truth without love and compassion for our hearers, they may tune out the message because of the attitude and demeanor of the messenger.
Of course, this principle applies to shepherds, deacons, and all those in positions of leadership in the assembly and the work of the local church. What do the brethren see? What influence are we exerting? Would our private lives strengthen or weaken our public leadership? Would a visitor who knows you be shocked to hear you leading a prayer?
The application of this principle reaches far beyond the church building.
Christian wives can influence their non-believing husbands to obey without preaching or nagging, but by the sheer impact of their godly influence (1 Pet. 3:1-6).
What about our influence in our daily lives at work? In the community? In our clubs? Or in a social setting? As we shun evil, do good, and engage in honest and honorable conduct, people see that we’re serious about our faith. However, if they hear foul language coming from our mouths, see shady business dealings, and observe us compromising our convictions, any efforts to invite them to church or to study the Bible will fall on deaf ears. People may forget our sermons, invitations, and religious conversations, but they rarely forget hypocrisy.
Parents also need to realize how powerful their example is to their children. Do they see regular church attendance as a priority in our lives? What about daily prayer? And Bible reading? Does our own language match what we preach to them? What about controlling our emotions? Or telling the truth?
There’s a poem by James Gibbeon entitled “The Little Chap Who Follows Me” which in part goes like this:
A careful man I want to be;
A little fellow follows me.
I do not dare to go astray
For fear he’ll go the self same way.
I cannot once escape his eyes,
Whate’er he sees me do, he tries.
Like me, he says he’s going to be;
The little chap who follows me.
Paul’s commendation of the Thessalonians rested partly on the fact that they knew what kind of men he and his companions were. Their lives reinforced their message. Later, Paul would praise the Thessalonian brethren because “the word of the Lord has sounded forth” from them (1 Thess. 1:8). Their faith influenced others.
The same is true today. People know. Your brethren know. Your co-workers know. Your friends know. Your children know. And, of course, the Lord knows.
–Ken Weliever, The Preacherman
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