James 3:16

On their 50th wedding anniversary, a couple was asked their secret to a long and happy marriage.

The husband said, “I have tried never to be selfish. After all, there is no ’I’ in the word ‘marriage.’”

The wife smiled and said, “For my part, I have never corrected my husband’s spelling.”

The husband’s miscue, obviously a reference to oft spoken adage “there’s no ‘I’ in team,” does remind us that selfishness is a problem in a relationship. No marriage, sports team, church, or community organization can reach its full potential, or even survive where there is a selfish, self-centered, and self willed spirit among its members.

Today’s passage from James 3:16 offers a stark reminder of the serious impact of a selfish attitude. “Wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind.”

Regarding this text Warren Wiersbe observed that “The essence of sin is selfishness. Eve disobeyed God because she wanted to eat of the tree and become wise like God. Abraham lied about his wife because he selfishly wanted to save his own life (Gen 12:10-20). Achan caused defeat to Israel because he selfishly took some forbidden loot from the ruins of Jericho (Josh 7). “We have turned every one to his own way” (Isa 53:6).”

Rick Warren once related that his Dad taught him the danger of “I-focused living by pointing out that the middle letter of ‘sin’ is ‘I’.” Rick further observed that the middle letter of “pride” just also happens to be ‘I’.” Warren further offered these insights about the sin of selfishness.

What other I-centered sins happen when you start living a self-focused life? You start to “whine” and “criticize.” You turn “envious,” “deceitful,” “defiant,” and “merciless”—because you want grace for yourself but not for others.

What are the results of living a self-focused life? Guilt, fatigue, pessimism, hostility, and emptiness—all with “I” at the center.

A closer look at the verse reveals one common selfish trait is jealousy. Interestingly the Greek word is “zelos” which can be rendered zeal, which is a positive quality. However, when one’s ardor turns inward in a negative way it produces an envious and contentious rivalry. Such a spirit will destroy a marriage, wreck a family, and divide a church. David Roper writes that such a person has ”dethroned God in his life and enthroned himself.” Thus, he is no longer seeking the divine wisdom, but worldly wisdom that James says is “sensual” and “demonic.”

Furthermore, while ambition to excel, improve one’s life and reach worthwhile goals is not wrong, it becomes sinful when it is solely self directed and selfishly absorbed. The Bible says, “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others” (Phil. 2:3-4).

Taking care of our own interests is not wrong, as long as we take into consideration the interests of others. However, when we run roughshod over the rights of others, ignore the needs of our fellow man, and pursue our personal gain or success at the expense of our colleagues, then our behavior becomes destructive and sinful.

The results of selfish attitudes and actions cause confusion and disorder. Richard Melson says the word means “disorder, disturbance, trouble, instability.” Apparently it was also used in a political context to describe anarchy. That’s what happens when we pursue an agenda for solely selfish reasons. And every kind of evil, vile and worthless results will ensue.

Of course, the antidote to the carnality of selfishness, is to be “crucified with Christ” (Gal. 2:20), to deny self and take up His cross (Lk. (9:23), and to “seek those things which are above” (Col. 3:2).

William Gladstone was well within the mark when he wrote, “Selfishness is the greatest curse of the human race.”

–Ken Weliever, The Preacherman